What I thought was the beginning was just the beginning of the end.
A sad update about Gender Dreaming, two years later
This post, originally published in 2022, has been updated December 27, 2024.
As many of you noticed, Gender Dreaming, the site where I’ve been answering all your questions about methods of natural gender selection - aka “swaying” - since 2010, has once again gone down. As this appears to be an ongoing state of affairs, and, since I have not been paid by Gender Dreaming in over a year despite honoring all financial commitments made by the site (which I will continue to do) I have decided I can no longer give up my own time to keep the site going. While I truly loved being a part Gender Dreaming and I loved the community we built there, I’m afraid I have to let go for my own sanity.
Contrary to popular belief, I don’t own Gender Dreaming. I simply showed up to work there every day just like other people might go to the office. I don’t even have the permissions to handle anything technical on the site. I don’t have any ability to fix problems, I can’t activate accounts or give refunds (except from my own pocket), and I have had zero communication with the site owner for years. I have no idea what is happening and thus I cannot offer anyone any explanations.
Because of the promises I made to you all to help you get the baby you’ve been dreaming of, I had attempted to keep the spirit of the site going even outside the boundaries of the site itself. I tried to the best of my ability to keep things afloat, in the hopes that the site owner would return and would fix the issues. This involved vast amounts of time answering questions by email, a situation that was awful for me, awful for my clients, and was never intended to be a permanent solution.
Again - if you bought something on Gender Dreaming that you have not received, please message me at atomicsagebrush@gmail.com and I will make that right, either by providing a sway plan and coaching for free, or else by refunding you from my own pocket. I will also continue to honor any of the coaching I arranged outside the site. And until they turn the lights out on me, I will periodically stop by at Gender Dreaming and answer the questions posted there.
But from here on in, I will no longer be answering questions via email for free. I am also not accepting any orders for personalized plans. Coaching via email is simply untenable; I make pennies per hour of work and messages constantly get lost. It was never intended to be a permanent solution. I was simply trying to keep things afloat at Gender Dreaming for as long as I could to allow the site owner time to live her life and come back as she was able to, and to help people as I could. Frankly, at this point I feel completely used both by the site owner and some of my clients, unfortunately, who abused the privilege of having email contact with me.
A few years ago, after the Gender Dreaming site went down a different time, my husband insisted that I repost the essays that I spent thousands of hours writing on a blog that I controlled. We kept this blog private and only took it public a couple years back, when it seemed like perhaps Gender Dreaming was gone for good. You can find that blog here: atomic sagebrush's Complete Gender Swaying Library. I left it public after that point because a few people used it and told me that it helpful, having a spot that was JUST essays without the forum posts, and not to replace Gender Dreaming. My intent in creating it was never to go off on my own - I would have vastly preferred to remain at Gender Dreaming and never wanted to start my own sites - but GD site was unreliable and I didn’t want to lose all the work I’d done.
I was never really able to complete that blog or work on this Substack because coaching via email was so time consuming. Now that I am no longer accepting new clients, I hope to have more time to continue reformatting and posting the most commonly used essays/guides, publishing them in my Gender Swaying Library for you guys to peruse at your leisure. The background science and diet info is already up. Be sure to click on the “Blog” button at the top of the welcome page to access the posts. Please note, I will NOT answer questions on the blog.
On this Substack I’ll be posting shorter essays - and writing new ones based on commonly asked questions. If you subscribe with the “free” option, you can have a nice short essay covering something you were wondering about pop up in your inbox a couple times a week. I will try to post 1-3 articles weekly, some new, some you may have missed, straight to your Inbox. If you want a sway plan and coaching via the comments section, you can purchase a Substack subscription. The “high tech at home” methods, including Clomid and Femara information, will be available to paying subscribers only.
Regardless of the future of the Gender Dreaming site, I very much appreciate everything that site owner has done for us over the years, giving us a safe place to come together and discuss not only swaying, but gender desire/disappointment, fertility, and so much more. Thanks for the memories!
If you are in contact with people from Gender Dreaming, or you know anyone else who might be interested, please share this post so more people can find me: